By Dr. Jan Hittelman
Over the last several years there has been an increased concern regarding children’s’ exposure to pornography on the Internet. Studies report that more than 40% of teens and preteens visit pornographic web sites on purpose or by accident. Internet porn is big business. It is estimated that 12% of all web sites are porn sites, generating revenues in the billions of dollars annually. If there are no restrictions in place, a child of any age can easily find Internet porn, often by accident (initially). Not surprisingly, boys are more likely than girls to seek out Internet porn and their use increases with age. Some early research indicates that those who frequent porn sites are more likely to objectify women and see sexual behavior as a purely physical act.
How can parents protect their children from exposure to online porn? There are many software options available that block porn sites from your computer. If children, however, are determined to view porn online, chances are they will find a way to do so. Nowadays, children can access the Internet on a number of devices in addition to the home computer, making the challenge of restricted viewing even more difficult. Another, more sophisticated strategy, is to use the power of communication and education. Parents often underestimate their influence over their child’s behavior. When parents take an active role of sharing their values and engaging their child in a meaningful discussion regarding risk behaviors, like Internet porn, children tend to internalize their parents’ values. It is much more effective to teach your child self-control than to get caught-up in a game of cat and mouse: Secretly checking computer history, putting restrictive blocks in place, etc.
For some children, Internet porn can quickly become an addictive behavior that can require treatment. In this case, adding restrictions wherever possible may be necessary. For most children, however, viewing oddities on the Internet is a function of developmental curiosity and experimentation to be expected during adolescence. It is a function of each family’s unique set of values to decide when, if ever, to allow this behavior and to what degree. Whatever your view of this behavior may be, it is important to take an active role in educating your child about this and other Internet etiquette.
Having supportive, ongoing, mutually respectful parent-child discussions regarding appropriate Internet behavior may be our most effective parental tool.